{this moment} -

{this moment} -

A Friday ritual. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember.

inspired by soulemama

my "baby" lost her first tooth...

through my Mango glasses

the time is here...me and my girls will leave Cairo for quite a while this summer - 6 WEEKS! wow, we've never been out that long.
well, there is a good reason for that. I am doing my yoga teacher training in August...

the last days were full of activities with the girls and their friends, clean up the girls rooms, go through their cupboards, rearrange toys, sorting my yoga stuff and collecting lots of Mangos from our two Mango trees in the garden.
oh, and today I found out it's not only us collecting them...the boys from the neighbourhood just climb the wall and jump into our garden to get the fruit...

I did as much jam as possible to use as many Mangos as possible. once they're down, they don't last long. so I was happy to have my "helping hands" to cut all the Mangos so I could stir the jam and fill it up...

now there is still lots of Mangos, too many. so I actually don't mind the boys having them but it would be so nice of them to ring the bell and ask...maybe I put a bag in front of the door tomorrow...and then...then we're off - the girls and I...

I am already sad to leave my husband for so long (which is ridiculous because we've been through phases of way longer separations...guess I'm just not used to it anymore), I cannot imagine to be without the girls for 4 weeks (but know it will be good for all of us), I don't have a clue where this path will lead to... and so right now I am quite nervous and my throat is tight and hey, what about letting go??? oh, how hard it still is sometimes...

but I found the way to my mat tonight...for half an hour I managed to focus on my breath and myself...that's what I need to do in the following weeks - simple isn't it :-)

{this moment} -

{this moment} -

A Friday ritual. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember.

inspired by soulemama

isn't it all about letting go?

my girls are on holiday...school finished last Thursday and since then we're (or rather I am) trying to let go...

their days during school are so structured and filled up with things they have to do and of course also want to do, that there is almost no time left for well "nothing"...
time to just sit - on the bed, on the sofa, in the grass...wherever... time to look through colorings one did or all the things that piled up in ones room - to find interest in them again or decide to not need it anymore... time to just wander around the house... time to watch Mama cooking... time to lay on the carpet and hum a tune... time to lay in the garden and watch the sky, birds, sounds...whatever...

yes, whatever...
our kids schedules are really filled up and so I try to really keep it to almost nothing during their holidays this time. without me even planning anything there is enough things just coming up anyway... but for my older one it was most important to spend her first day of holidays in her pyjamas - all day long! hang out at home is something she isn't able to do very often, so she really enjoyed it and so did I! unfortunately I couldn't stay in my pyjamas all day, but I loved seeing the girls enjoying their nothingness...

we're all so obsessed by having to do something, even if we don't...it is not "cool" to have an empty diary and time for oneself or others...
as a (officially) non-working Mum for 6 years now and mainly living in countries where I do have somebody helping in the house, whoever I meet the first question I get is: "so, what are YOU doing all day?"
and I found me defending myself, counting up all the things I do... I got tired of it. my usual answer now is: "NOTHING"

unfortunately this is not true for most of my days and I know that there is a lot of women out there who know exactly what I mean. and even if I were doing NOTHING all day long I should just enjoy it and be grateful that I am in that happy position to do so...
slowly I start to let go... there is things that needn't be done on a day I am really tired and know that the afternoon or next day need all my energy anyway... there is hardly anything as important than "just" hanging out with my kids, if possible... and there is almost nothing as important than 10minutes just for myself.

not that I am able to let go of too many things yet, but I am very grateful that I am starting to realize and that I am in the position to do so... one very simple example tonight...

both girls had a movie night...we are on holiday bedtime, but it was even later than that...a year ago I might have freaked and tried to have them in bed as fast as possible, lights off, sleep (and we might all have ended up crying...)
tonight I enjoyed calming down after the house was empty, hugging my girls, and then of course gently getting them towards the bathroom... I did say no to another little bedtime-movie but when my little girl looked at me with her big eyes and asked if she could still get a massage, I did let go of whatever else I had in mind for the rest of the evening and treated me and the girls with some special time and a massage...

"being touched and caressed,

being massaged,

is food 'for the infant'.

food as necessary

as minerals, vitamins, and proteins.

deprived of this food,

the name of which is love,

'babies' would rather die.

and they often do."

words I wanted to share, written by Frederick Leboyer  in his book "loving hands, the traditional art of baby massage"... my kids still love it...